Kindred Spirits

In Psalm 143 verse seven, David says,

“Come quickly, Lord, and answer me, for my depression deepens. 

Don’t turn away from me or I will die.”

David and I are kindred spirits.

When I got up this morning and asked God for some encouragement,

He led me to the above mentioned verse.

My initial response was,

“YES! That’s what I’m talking about. 

Thank you David and thank You Lord!”

Then, my old religious self said, 

“Now, you can’t admit that publicly 

because feeling depressed is giving into sinfulness.”

Ugh!

But after some self-loathing and a nap, 

I decided that I was going to embrace that verse 

and publicly declare it, 

because, hey, despite my perfection in Christ, 

I am still prone to human emotions…

just like everyone else.

Our situation has been so difficult for so long 

that some days I simply feel depressed.

To admit this publicly is a huge step for me.

It has only been the past few years that

I have learned to allow myself to experience true Grace

-God’s grace.

I had been steeped in performance-based religion 

for so long that when I fall back into those old habits,

I get extremely frustrated with myself,

thus, focusing on performance rather than on grace.

HA!

What a vicious circular web the enemy tries to weave.

This afternoon, Holy Spirit said to me,

“Lysa, I am not obsessed with sin the way (some) people are. 

I’m obsessed with Grace. 

I am ALL about Grace. 

Remember, Jesus is the fulfillment of Grace. 

And I prefer your honesty much more than I judge your performance.”

What an amazingly Loving, Gracious God!

And you know what else? 

When I shared that verse on another social media platform, 

a few people responded; 

some with encouragement 

and some with the admission 

that they too have been experiencing a difficult day. 

I hope that this time I have learned (truly) 

to not underestimate the power of honesty, realness and Grace! 

Shalom!